Here's the dealio... (Info Post)
Sep. 22nd, 2013 03:31 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pet_detectiveRookie Card Statistics:
Name: Ace Ventura, Pet Detective
Nickname: Ace, will suffice I suppose
Age: 27... Okay, okay 33... and a half...
Birthday: January 17, and don't forget the cake this time! I like chocolate by the way.
Gender: I've got my man card right here
Height: 6'2"
Weight: Now, now a lady never tells... but if you must know... I'm a super buff 205lbs
Bloodtype: For all you vampires out there, I'm AB+
Sexuality: Ready and raring to go all you lovely female bipeds out there
Eyes: Brown
Hair: Fabulously perfect in every way, including its brown color
Education: Certified Pet Detective and Emergency Veterinarian (I also teach salsa dancing)
Religion: I am of the Enlightened Ones having found inner peace and calm and such other things
Country of Origin: Proud son of the US of A!
Hobbies: Solving pet mysteries, rescuing missing animals, saving endangered fauna, and also pilates on Tuesdays
Family: My animal friends are my family... and my parents are retired down in Palm Springs, Florida
Personality:
Some might call me a crazy person, a maniac, an idiot, or a danger to himself and society, and while there is a grain of truth to all these titles, I prefer to think of myself as... pause for dramatic effect... a genius. I know, I know. Humble too. I have all the traits you would expect of a detective. Intelligence, wit, keen attention to details, great hair, and wonderfully smelling breath. I will accept any case no matter how great or small, though the greater ones will cost a higher fee.
I get along with others, mostly. Unless you're a jerk. A big jerky jerk. A king of all that is jerk. We should get along splendidly. Especially splendidly if you are a fine young lady of above average beauty.
But I digress, There is almost no animal that I cannot find, save, tame, and befriend. For I am here upon this Earth for one reason, and one reason only. To solve animal mysteries and fight for my little furry, feathered, scaled, and otherwise skinned friends. Whether they walk on four legs or two or even three, I am here to fight for the little guy. To say that I care for all members of the animal kingdom would be an understatement, I love all of my animal friends. Except for one particular species of flying devil spawn that shall remain nameless in these hallowed halls of... my... communicator...
And so, to those who would wish to do harm to my fauna friends, I say only this: Leh-hu-zeh-hers! Lehuzers!
History:
Having successfully found and rescued the beloved Miami Dolphins' mascot and the Wachutu's sacred... neugh... BAT... I find myself rather caseless at the moment. It's been about a month since I returned from Africa, so I've needed to re-adjust myself to a more familiar, American climate. Though, most likely, the real reason I'm not currently solving any animal mysteries is because I'm no longer on planet Earth. But as a now fat, aging actor once said, I must boldly go where no animal detective has gone before... and solve interstellar animal mysteries. Admittedly, I flavored that last part myself, but I think you get the picture. I don't rightly remember how I ended up on this spaceship with all these... unique... rapscallions. But I know this! Wherever there are animals in danger, there shall also be a pet detective to save them. And by pet detective, I mean me. Ace Ventura. Pet Detective.
Name: Ace Ventura, Pet Detective
Nickname: Ace, will suffice I suppose
Age: 27... Okay, okay 33... and a half...
Birthday: January 17, and don't forget the cake this time! I like chocolate by the way.
Gender: I've got my man card right here
Height: 6'2"
Weight: Now, now a lady never tells... but if you must know... I'm a super buff 205lbs
Bloodtype: For all you vampires out there, I'm AB+
Sexuality: Ready and raring to go all you lovely female bipeds out there
Eyes: Brown
Hair: Fabulously perfect in every way, including its brown color
Education: Certified Pet Detective and Emergency Veterinarian (I also teach salsa dancing)
Religion: I am of the Enlightened Ones having found inner peace and calm and such other things
Country of Origin: Proud son of the US of A!
Hobbies: Solving pet mysteries, rescuing missing animals, saving endangered fauna, and also pilates on Tuesdays
Family: My animal friends are my family... and my parents are retired down in Palm Springs, Florida
Personality:
Some might call me a crazy person, a maniac, an idiot, or a danger to himself and society, and while there is a grain of truth to all these titles, I prefer to think of myself as... pause for dramatic effect... a genius. I know, I know. Humble too. I have all the traits you would expect of a detective. Intelligence, wit, keen attention to details, great hair, and wonderfully smelling breath. I will accept any case no matter how great or small, though the greater ones will cost a higher fee.
I get along with others, mostly. Unless you're a jerk. A big jerky jerk. A king of all that is jerk. We should get along splendidly. Especially splendidly if you are a fine young lady of above average beauty.
But I digress, There is almost no animal that I cannot find, save, tame, and befriend. For I am here upon this Earth for one reason, and one reason only. To solve animal mysteries and fight for my little furry, feathered, scaled, and otherwise skinned friends. Whether they walk on four legs or two or even three, I am here to fight for the little guy. To say that I care for all members of the animal kingdom would be an understatement, I love all of my animal friends. Except for one particular species of flying devil spawn that shall remain nameless in these hallowed halls of... my... communicator...
And so, to those who would wish to do harm to my fauna friends, I say only this: Leh-hu-zeh-hers! Lehuzers!
History:
Having successfully found and rescued the beloved Miami Dolphins' mascot and the Wachutu's sacred... neugh... BAT... I find myself rather caseless at the moment. It's been about a month since I returned from Africa, so I've needed to re-adjust myself to a more familiar, American climate. Though, most likely, the real reason I'm not currently solving any animal mysteries is because I'm no longer on planet Earth. But as a now fat, aging actor once said, I must boldly go where no animal detective has gone before... and solve interstellar animal mysteries. Admittedly, I flavored that last part myself, but I think you get the picture. I don't rightly remember how I ended up on this spaceship with all these... unique... rapscallions. But I know this! Wherever there are animals in danger, there shall also be a pet detective to save them. And by pet detective, I mean me. Ace Ventura. Pet Detective.
